Outlaws

Chapter 4

by Kayla Chavi

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Alternate/Romance

email: kaylachavi@yahoo.com

website: http://www.angelfire.com/ky2/todream/index.htm

* * *

His entire perception of her had changed from that short
conversation with her brother. He had no doubts that there were
some things that Andrew had left out, but it didn’t matter. What
did matter was that he was no longer trying to deny what he
felt.

So he watched her from the doorway, just drinking in the sight
of her with his eyes, not caring that it was the most clichéd
thing in the world. She caught him staring at her and she tilted
her head, a little confused at his actions. He just smiled and
slowly walked up to her, circling her waist with his arms and
drawing her back into his chest. 

“Your brother’s scary,” he teased quietly and she laughed,
letting herself snuggle back into his embrace.

“He’s my brother, he’s supposed to be like that,” she joked back
and just let him hold her. After a moment she closed her eyes,
wondering a little in awe at the peace she felt just by being
held by him. She suddenly recognized that this was the same
feeling she had whenever she was enfolded in his arms. She then
blinked when she realized that he had said something to her,
forcing her away from the epiphany. “Hmmm?”

He chuckled and she could feel the tremor of his chest, “I said,
with a sister like you he has to be.”

She twisted in his arms so that she was facing him, an indignant
look upon her face, “What in hell is that supposed to mean?” she
demanded. He laughed and kissed her gently, his arms tightening
around her waist.

“Relax, Rena. I just meant that you’re too beautiful for you’re
own good and,” he took her chin firmly in his hand, forcing her
to look at him, “I don’t want you to argue with me. I think you
are one of the damnedest most beautiful women I have ever seen.
Believe me, Rena, I’ve seen them all.”

Her bright blue eyes just blinked several times before she
turned a bright red. She opened her mouth several times to say
something but found she did not have the words. Darien just
grinned and kissed her again, “I think I like being engaged,” he
joked and was unable to go without kissing her forehead. He
wondered if she was aware of the power she held over him. No
woman alive had ever obsessed him so much. Even having the new
knowledge about her, hadn’t changed his feelings for her.

In fact, it just increased them. He wondered how it would feel
to have someone totally consume his being with just a mere
thought. He wondered if she would ever feel the same about him.
He wondered if she even could.

He was wondering too many things. With a mental slap, he tried
to pull himself back to the present reality and away from the
new fantasies that kept creeping into his thoughts.

“Darien, Serena, dinner’s on,” Mina called, breaking his chain
of thoughts, making Darien feel a little more in control. The
blond ushered them to the table, much like a mother hen would
her little chicks. She placed them right next to each other and
smiled slightly. Her husband had yet to inform her of what he
had overheard, so she believed that the two people in front of
her were really and truly in love.

The group sat down at the small table and joined hands in
prayer. This was a little odd to Darien, who had never really
been a religious man, but he found it somewhat comforting to ask
God for a simple blessing for the food. Once it was over, he
claimed Serena’s hand and decided that it would be all right for
a fiancé to keep her hand within his.

Mina had to restrain herself from sighing.

“So,” Andrew said after they had all had a chance to get a
little bit of food into them, “How did you meet, Sere?” he asked
his sister and she burst out laughing. He raised an eyebrow,
failing to see what was so funny. Darien laughed quietly as well
and gently squeezed Serena’s hand.

“She rescued me,” he said after a moment in an attempt to
explain the blonde’s laughter. “I had been taken prisoner by
some overzealous Marshals.”

“And we all know how Serena feels about Marshals,” Andrew said
dryly.

Serena finally calmed down enough so she could shrug at her
brother’s comment, “Hey, can I help it that the whole lot of
them are hypocrites?” she gave her brother a stern look,
“They’re corrupt and devious and more evil than I am.”

Darien raised an eye at her bitterness, “So that would be the
reason behind your little badge collection?” Serena smiled
innocently and Darien just shook his head, “I’m impressed,” he
said.

Rei rolled her eyes, “Tell him about the space you have set up
for *him*”

“Him?” Darien looked down at Serena and saw that she was
blushing faintly. “Should I be jealous?”

“Hardly,” she said and shrugged, “There’s one Marshal that I
respect,” she said after a moment, “He’s the only one that I
know of that is on good record with the people. He’s fair, and
honest, and knows when to admit when his men have done something
wrong, and isn’t afraid to punish them. He doesn’t abuse his
power.”

“He sounds unreal,” Darien remarked after a moment.

Serena chuckled, “Oh, I’m sure he has some flaw and that he’s
human, but still,” she sighed, “I want to meet him.”

“So who is he?”

“Oh,” she blinked, not realizing that she hadn’t told Darien the
name yet, “Head Marshal Shields.”

Darien hid his reaction to his own name rather well, “Shields?”
There was no pause, no blanche, just a simple indifferent
statement.

“Yeah, I don’t know his first name, but it’s not going to
matter. All the little badges have names on them anyway, so I’m
figuring that when I meet him, I’ll know.” She shrugged, “Of
course, I’ll embarrass him like I always do, but it’ll be a
respectful embarrassment.”

“Of course,” Darien said dryly and kissed her cheek. He didn’t
know if he should feel guilty or be flattered. On the one hand,
he was involved in the ultimate deception. He knew now, that it
was possible to accuse him of playing with her heart. On the
other hand, she respected him, the real him, and he felt a
little bit of pride at the fact that she didn’t hate him the way
she had all the others. 

This certainly was food for thought.

Serena wrinkled her nose at him before just laying her head on
his shoulder. Andrew watched them and mentally sighed. During
dinner he had decided that he wasn’t going to say anything about
the con his sister was giving him. For the first time in five
years, she truly looked happy and comfortable around a man who
wasn’t him. He wasn’t going to take that from her, for he loved
his sister too much. 

And it had become obvious to him, that Darien, while he may not
have acknowledged it yet, was very much in love with her.

He could only pray that they would find their happiness in each
other before his sister did something amazingly stupid, like
getting herself killed.

* * *

“I thought when two people got engaged, their family tried their
hardest to make sure they didn’t share a bed before the
wedding,” Serena commented once she and Darien were in her old
room.

Darien chuckled, “They probably already assumed that we’re
sleeping together and they want to be polite about it,” he
suggested as he looked around the room. It was large and
spacious, for she had the entire attic as her room. The bed was
near a window, so she could look at the moon and stars at night.
The bed itself was large and antique and would hold both of them
without any problem.

Well, the only problem being that Serena wasn’t feeling very
comfortable with the idea with the two of them sharing a bed.
Darien of course had no problem with it, he was really looking
forward to the idea that he would be able to sleep next to her.
Then again, Darien was a male human being, so this really wasn’t
something too surprising.

But, because he prided himself on being a gentleman he felt
obligated to make the honorable suggestion, “Well, I can always
sleep on the floor,” he said when he saw that she was looking at
the bed a little apprehensively. It was almost odd, the way that
she no long completely hid her emotions from him. 

She was silent for a long moment before she shook her head, “If
I know my brother, he probably doesn’t think that this is real,
so he’ll be doing his best to find out. We’ve slept on the
ground next to each other before, a bed shouldn’t be any
different, just more comfortable.”

Darien smiled slightly before nodding and going over to his bags
to change and get ready for bed. He pulled off his shirt and
hunted for the pants that he normally wore to bed. Quickly, he
dressed for bed, “You really want to prove something to him,
don’t you,” he said as he stood up and turned around.

Serena was standing with her back to him and was pulling off her
own shirt, her pants already gone. Darien swallowed the sudden
lump in his throat and watched as she prepared to slide her
customary nightshirt on. Her arms were just being placed in the
sleeves when a very naughty idea popped into his head.

“Yeah,” she was saying, “It’s weird I know, but I want to make
him think that I’m desirable to at least one person.” She
prepared to pull the shirt over her head, “It also doesn’t hurt
that you’re attractive!” the last word was said in surprise as
his arms slipped around her bare waist.

“You think I’m attractive?” he teased, hugging her to his chest.
He felt her shiver as the bare skin of her back came in contact
with the skin of his chest. Serena was desperately clutching her
shirt to her chest, for she was in simple underwear and that was
it. 

She had a very good reason to feel half naked.

“Darien!” she hissed, trying not to yell. “Let go of me!”

He laughed quietly and lightly stroke the skin of her stomach.
She breathed in sharply and closed her eyes, “I’m flattered,” he
teased before lightly kissing her shoulder. “But you shouldn’t
feel the need to prove to your brother that you’re desirable,”
he said seriously.

She sighed heavily before he could continue, “I don’t mean
wanted for sex, Darien,” she whispered, “I mean desirable for
myself. I’m not an idiot or humble; I know that I’m pretty and
that if I wanted to I could be just as active as Rei. I guess I
want to show my brother that even being The Bitch, someone out
there is going to want me. And that someone isn’t going to be
some loser.”

Darien was silent for a long moment before he turned her around
to face him. The shirt was still tightly clutched in her hands
and he held her firmly by her shoulders. She wasn’t sure what
she expected the statement on his face to be, but what she saw
certainly wasn’t what she had expected.

He was looking down at her with a gentleness and a tenderness
that she didn’t know he was capable of feeling. “Rena,” his
voice was soft, although it still demanded her attention, “Rena,
you are one of the most beautiful women I know, and not just
physically,” he didn’t give her the opportunity to interrupt
him, for he gently placed his fingers over her lips, “You have a
spirit of fire and a passion that most women don’t have. You are
always in control of everything around you and if you aren’t,
then you do a damn good job of pretending you are. You are
compassionate to those who deserve it and absolutely ruthless
when it comes the embarrassment of idiots. You are amazing
because of who you are. God, you are so amazing you managed to
change the heart of a chauvinistic bastard, who can no longer
imagine living a life where he had never met you. Rena, *you*
are beautiful.”

She just stared at him not sure what to say to this. She was
still trembling slightly when his hand came from her lips to
hold the side of her face. Gently, he thumbed away the tears
that she hadn’t been aware of shedding, while his other hand
came down to rest gently in the small of her back.

“Damn, you’re beautiful,” he said again and then leaned down to
kiss her. This kiss was nowhere near as fierce or as deep as any
of their previous kisses, but the pure passion of it couldn’t
even compare. It was sweet and warm as his mouth gently moved
against hers. The kiss seemed to last an eternity before at long
last they pulled away from each other, their lips just slightly
apart. Darien lightly ran his hand along her neck and shoulder
and then down her arm before he just pressed his forehead
against her. Their eyes were closed as their breath mingled and
both tried to regain control of themselves in the aftermath of
such a simple kiss.

“Oh hell,” Darien muttered after he had stroked the bare skin of
her sides. “You’re half naked.”

The statement seemed to strike Serena as funny, so she giggled
quietly and looked up at him. Her eyes searched for any hint of
deception but she found none. So, still holding on tightly to
the shirt, she turned back around. She heard him pull away and
walk over to the bed and climb in. She stood there for a moment
in the quiet of the room before she finished pulling her shirt
on.

Taking a deep breath, she turned around to face him. Her
thoughts raced furiously as she tried to come up with something
to say, something to respond to his statements with.
Unfortunately, she could not think of anything that seemed
appropriate. Everything seemed out of place. So, she stood
there, a little lost and unsure what to do. Finally she was able
to decide on something.

“Thank you.”

She saw him smile at her and then pull down the covers on what
was to be her part of the bed, “You have nothing to thank me
for, now come to bed.”

For the first time since meeting her, she complied with his
wishes without a sarcastic comment It worried him when she
didn’t comment on his demand to join him. He could see now that
he didn’t want to tame her in any way. He didn’t want to break
her spirit, for that was what he had come to care about in her.
His stomach felt like a ball of lead as he became incredibly
dejected at the thought of a Serena that had been broken.

Silently, she slipped into the sheets and wasn’t surprised when
his arm came to lay across her waist. She just closed her eyes
and settled into the pillows, hoping that she could become
comfortable enough to fall asleep while lying so close to him.

“And Darien?”

“Yes?”

“Watch your hands, I would hate to have to do something
drastic.”

He chuckled and impishly kissed the back of her neck, “Duly
noted,” he said, unable to hide the happiness he felt.

No. Serena would never be broken. Not by him. Not by anyone. And
certainly, not by Diamond.

* * *

Darien wasn’t exactly sure how it happened, but there was a
distinct change in the way he and Serena acted towards each
other. He couldn’t find an exact turning point, but he was aware
that one had taken place. He could have said that the first
night they slept in the bed together, was a turning point, but
he felt that wasn’t the right place. He even wondered if it
could have been before that night, but came to the conclusion
that it wasn’t important. It had happened, and that’s all that
matter. Now, the two were able to joke and fool around,
convincing nearly the entire town that they were deeply in love.

There was a freedom and a peace that had settled over the two of
them. There was no longer the tension that had been there before
and Rei noticed that they seemed to have become genuine friends.
It confused her more than anyone else, for she did not think
that they were capable of being anything but enemies or lovers,
yet here they were, becoming closer and closer as friends. 

It had become some kind of paradise for all involved. Especially
for Darien and Serena.

This was Darien’s current train of thought as he and Serena were
out in the middle of a large prairie, just the two of them,
laying in the grass side by side.

Earlier that morning, Serena had braided her hair. However, that
had only lasted long enough for them to ride out to the
wide-open field. During the earlier part of their conversation,
Darien had asked her to unravel it. She had flatly refused,
resulting in a short tumble that included and devilish kiss on
Darien’s part, and the unraveling of Serena’s hair, also
compliments of Darien.

She had laughed and shook out the braid before laying back in
the grass. The long golden strands had settled in waves, fanning
out around her lightly tanned face. Her eyes were closed and her
lips slightly parted. She looked like some mythic fairy out of a
child’s storybook, having a ethereal sense about her. The only
movement from her at the moment, was her gentle breathing, and
then slight wrinkling of her nose where Darien was tickling her
with a long piece of grass.

He was lying next to her on his side, having propped himself up
with his elbow. His dark hair was slightly mussed and tangled
form their little tumble. How was he to know that the small Ice
Queen was secretly very ticklish? Her retaliation had been to
impishly mess up his hair once she found out that the tall man
was not ticklish at all. His dark blue eyes just watched her as
he playfully tickled her with the piece of grass. His eyes
reflected his feelings of contentment and paradise.

“Darien?” She didn’t open her eyes, but he suspected from the
trace movement of emotions that flitted across her beautiful
features, that her eyes were probably threatening to fill with
tears.

“Yes, Serena?” he continued to tickle her face and neck with the
piece of grass.

“I’ve been thinking,” it was a simple statement that came after
a period of silence.

Darien stopped his teasing and looked down at her. He watched
her face closely, not wanting to miss anything that might give
him an inkling to what she was about to tell him.

“About what?” he finally prompted when it seemed that she
wouldn’t continue. Even after his gently prompting she stayed
silent. The silence stretched between them, and Darien felt like
the already substantial void between them grow even wider.
“Rena?” He brought a hand to her face, not wanting to let
himself loose what he had so recently gained.

“There. . .” her voice faltered and she placed her hand over
his. She desperately needed his strength in this, even if didn’t
know why she was in such a desperate need. “There is something I
want to tell you. Something. . .something that I haven’t really
told anyone else, but I want to tell you.”

Darien nodded and kissed her forehead tenderly. Her voice was
sad and almost innocent, bringing his mind back to the paradox
that was Serena. “Rena, you can tell me anything,” he said
honestly.

She was able to hear that sincerity in his voice and the emotion
he put behind those few simple words. She managed a tiny smile,
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” The sentence was barely a whisper,
but he was able to hear it anyway. Again, he kissed her forehead
and then brushed his lips across hers.

“Take your time, Rena. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

Again, there was a long period of silence before Serena took a
deep breath and swallowed the lump that had formed in her
throat.

“My mother was the most beautiful woman west of the
Mississippi,” she said quietly, “Her hair was long and
silvery-blond. She had eyes that were crystal blue and held the
wisdom of the world. She was the essence of beauty, for she
cared about everyone and everything. When I was a little girl,
all I wanted was to be like her.”

Serena lapsed into silence before she rolled onto her side,
facing Darien, but looking down at the grass intently. The dark
haired man just watched her, not interrupting her and letting
her take her time with whatever it was that she was going to
tell him. Already he had an idea, but he wasn’t going to tell
her that he knew. He was just going to let her talk to him. 

He knew that this was going to be the most difficult thing she
had ever done in her life. She was going to trust him with a
part of herself that she had never given anyone before, not even
her best friend Rei, or her brother’s wife and childhood friend,
Mina.

“If my mother was the most beautiful, then my father was equally
handsome,” she began to pick at the grass, her voice barely
above a whisper, “Andrew looks a lot like him. I have never seen
two people more in love, or devoted to each other. Along with
being handsome, my father was very rich. He helped to found this
little town and got people coming here. Everything was perfect
until He came.” She practically spat out the pronoun of the
hateful man. It was as if she couldn’t even bare to say his name
because of her loathing of him.

She looked up at Darien briefly before looking back down at the
ground. “No one liked Diamond from the start. He was overly
harsh to offenders of the law and he locked up men for no reason
at all. Sometimes he would starve people in the small prison for
days or weeks. My father openly fought against him and his way
of handling the law. He wrote to Washington and requested a
transfer, telling them of the atrocities that Diamond was
committing. Washington never responded, never gave a reply,” her
brow furrowed slightly, “I was fourteen at the time when all of
this was going on,” she added as an afterthought.

“Then one night the blacksmith was killed, shot to death in the
head. Diamond did an investigation and my father was accused of
murder. He was sentenced to death by hanging,” Serena closed her
eyes painfully, reliving the memories as she spoke. “He was
innocent,” she said hoarsely, “There was no way that my father
could have done that. He was a good man and cared more about the
town and then people in it, then he cared about riches or
prestige. The townspeople all knew this and they protested,
saying that there was no way, no way that Ken Tanner could have
committed such a crime. Diamond didn’t listen.”

She stopped completely then, obviously struggling with memories
and emotions. Darien gently reached out to take her hand,
stopping her from picking the grass. He gently squeezed her hand
and then lightly touched her hair in a comforting gesture, one
of the few times it wasn’t arousing, just comforting. It proved
to both him and her, that they had an actual relationship based
on something other than flirting or control.

“The entire town knew how Diamond felt about my mother,” she
continued, drawing from his silent support and strength, “They
knew that he wanted her, that he lusted after her. Even I knew,
and I was still only a child, not yet grown into my brother‘s
old boots. My mother knew this as well, and she went to him. She
said she would do anything, if he would just release my father.
She pleaded with him, maintaining his innocence. Diamond . . .
he demanded that she give herself to him, and then he would let
my father go.

“He used her, he ravished her, and she let him,” Serena’s voice
had lost all emotion. It was cold and dispassionate. She could
have been talking about the weather, for all the feeling she put
into it. “And then. . .in the morning, he hung my father.” Her
jaw clenched and she balled her hands into fists as if she was
trying not to scream. She forced herself not to cry, not letting
anything out, not letting herself give into the pain of the past
she was forcing herself to relive.

“That night, my mother killed herself. She was unable to live
with what she had become. In a letter to Andrew and I, she said
that she had become a whore and was on her way to hell. Suicide
wasn’t going to change her salvation. She said her only regret
was that she would never see my father again. Then she slit her
wrists and let herself drown in the bathroom tub. I was the one
who found her.”

This time she was unable to stop the tears that fell down her
cheeks. Darien gently thumbed them away and held her close. Like
always, he somehow knew when to hold her, when to touch her,
when it was the right time to be close to her. He held her to
his chest, letting her quietly cry out all of her frustrations
and her sorrows of the past. Her blond head was tucked under his
chin and he stroked her hair soothingly, in an effort to help
her calm down.

It was several minutes before she was able to get a hold of
herself. “I was so mad,” she whispered, “and hurt, and I felt
like I had been betrayed by the ones I had loved the most. I
made Andrew teach me how to shoot. Already I could ride and
fight dirty, as my father used to say. I could use a rifle, but
I just didn’t know how to shoot a pistol. It took several months
before I felt I was good enough. So I challenged Marshal Diamond
to a duel.

“He thought it was some child’s joke, that there was no way in
heaven or hell, that I would win. I think he meant to graze my
arm or leg, I’ll never really know, because he gave me the first
shot. A lot of people believe that I was too scared to aim
properly, because I didn’t shoot to kill. In reality I hit him
exactly where I wanted to.”

“In his assets,” Darien said dryly, recalling one of his first
conversations with Serena, where she had threatened to unman
him. He chuckled quietly and Serena actually gave a small little
smile.

“Yeah,” she said, her normal voice returning, the tone of the
cool and calm Serena he had grown to care about was back, if
only for a moment before he heard her sigh softly. “He was
furious, you can probably imagine,” her voice was muffled
slightly by his chest, as she buried her face back into him,
“Andrew told me that it might have been possible that I went too
far, but I didn’t care, I still had so much anger and hurt in
me. I still do. Three months later, he challenged me to another
duel. This time, he shot first, but I dodged it, it nicked my
arm.” She pulled back her sleeve, showing a small scar, letting
him see it for a moment, and then covered it again.

“I shot twice. One hit him in the shoulder; the other in the
gut. He died two days later.” Her sentences were simple as she
tried to distance herself once more from the painful memories.
“The night he died, I left town. I taught myself how to survive
alone and then I took my revenge on all the hypocrites, the
marshals, the rich, men. It didn’t matter. I met Rei and she
became like the older sister I never had. She and I have been
friends ever since.” She stopped as if that was the end to
everything, but then she suddenly shifted so that she could look
up at him. Lightly, she traced his scar, over the bridge of his
nose and smiled at him slightly.

“Then I met a man who was the biggest bastard alive. He was
rude, chauvinistic, stubborn, handsome, and in his own way,
charming. And of course I. . .I fell for him, I fell harder then
I ever imagined would be possible,” her voice had dropped again
into a whisper. “You said that I managed to change your heart,
Darien. Well, you changed mine just as much.”

He smiled back down at her warmly; he took the hand that had
touched his scar and kissed it gently along the upper palm. He
then slowly moved his mouth along the inner palm and then to her
wrist. He pulled her close to his chest before burying his face
in her hair, “But I fell first,” he said purposely trying to
start an argument. “You bewitched me first.”

She laughed quietly knowing that he was trying to make her
comfortable again, trying to bring her out of her small
momentary depression and back to normalcy. She smiled and then
looked up at him, opening her mouth to argue with him. She
stopped, her mouth still open when she caught the familiar
mischievous gleam in his eye as he leaned down and kissed her
gently.

“Don’t you ever shut up, Rena?” he teased before his mouth
descended upon hers once more. It would be long past sunset
before either of them could find the will to move back to the
ranch.

For those few hours, they dwelt in paradise.